Late Night Ramblings of a Tech Support Agent on the Edge...

4 days in a row and not a single decent quote of the week to speak of...

Ah well, there's still been good calls though!

Tonight I had a young woman who called in, unable to connect to her internet only to tell me that she had the router and modem plugged in, but there weren't any lights lit on the modem. Well, it's no small wonder that you can't connect to the internet! Without power, there's no internet. So, I ask if it's plugged into an outlet connected to a wall switch. Reasonable question, right? Right. It's not. Okay! Have you tried to plug it into any other outlets to see if it's maybe the outlet? Why should you?? Your router is plugged into the same outlet and it has power. Okay, well.... we'll move on then, because it's apparent that this customer doesn't want to try any other outlets. Got it. Troubleshoot everything else that might be keeping her from having internet... everything checks out. Dispatch a technician! Okay then.... if the tech gets out there and the issue winds up being that outlet that's the problem, it's going to be a charge of X-dollars to send the truck out. What? You want to try another outlet right now while I'm on the phone? Suuuuuure! *mumble grumble under my breath* Not like I didn't ask you if you would do that 10 minutes ago.... Hmmm? You tried another outlet and there's still no power to the modem? Okay, then it looks like the tech will have to swap out the modem for you when he's out there.

It's funny what people will do when faced with the knowledge that if they're wrong you're going to charge them money. Heh.

I did get to talk to a sweet old lady who shared part of her life with me tonight. She'd just gotten home after being away for 2 months which she spent with her son who had lung cancer while he went through chemotherapy. The good news is that they caught it early and it's treatable and he's going to be fine, but she did take a bit of a blow through those months watching her son go through the effects of chemo. Poor lady has had cancer herself too! She'd been a realtor for 27 years as well and we shared the joys and pains of customer service over the years. She'd asked whether I got a lot of people who yelled at me and that's what got us into the conversation. If I'd had time to talk all night, I bet ya she would have. But we had to get her TV fixed. Wound up being the coaxial cable was not only unplugged, but the pin inside it was bent and wouldn't go into the connector on the back of her receiver. So she was going to get one of her kids to go get her a new cable and call back if that didn't work.

Ya take the good with the bad some nights and some nights the good calls outweigh the bad ones and some nights... well... by the time you're done with the night ya just wonder what the hell has happened to the human race that we've become SO dependent on technology.

Oh! The other call I had tonight that had me cracking up laughing was the 50 year old woman who was working on setting up her internet. Now, if you remember, one of my pet-peeves is people who call Tech Support on speakerphone. This woman may be the one and only exception. The phone picks up and I hear the loudest woman known to man, I think. She's got me on speakerphone and is yelling so she can be heard, which she didn't need to do when she was right by the phone, but then she explained that her phone was in the kitchen and her computer, that she was trying to get connected, was clear out in her entryway the next room over. Even clear over at her computer she caused me to turn the volume on my phone down! I think I could have heard this woman from her house to my computer even without the phone! She did most of the talking, too, because she would add noises and whoops and hollars as things happened on her computer screen. She had me laughing! Poor thing, I couldn't even help her get connected because she was running on an ancient computer with Windows 98!! But she said her computer guy had come over and "juiced up" her computer so she could connect! Except that, when we went to set up a connection to the internet.... it wanted to set up a DIAL-UP connection! Ugh... so I tried to get her through to one of our other computer tech support agencies and THEY don't even deal with anything older than Windows 2000! It's crazy! So I let her know that and she wrote it all down so she could see what she could do. She took it all with grace and style, but good GRIEF!! I could barely HEAR once I got off the phone with her!! LOL

Ahhh, well... again, ya take the good with the bad.

Until next time, dear readers!

Lis

Tech Support Agents are People too!

Remember that the next time you call in to Tech Support with the attitude that we're always wrong and nothing we say is the truth.

Case in point: Customer calls in and immediately demands that we send one of our services techs out to repair her services. This is something that we charge for if they demand it without going through our troubleshooting process first. So I begin by telling her that to do so will cost her X-amount of dollars. Before I can finish the statement and tell her that we charge that ONLY if she doesn't go through the process with me first, she immediately starts jumping on my case. Thus begins the steady stream of beligerent, degrading personal attacks to me and my company. But mostly to ME. I was a liar, I was a horrible customer service agent, I was misleading, I was everything but a white girl doing her job. She laughed at me, whistled like she was bored when I was trying to tell her important information about her technician dispatch, which troubleshooting led me to anyway... if she had just called me calmly, discussed her issue with me CALMLY, and accepted the tech gracefully things would have taken less time and came to the same end. But no... instead she spent a great deal of my time interrupting me, giving me misinformation (like her account information so I could pull her account up in the first place), refusing to answer simple questions, and treating me like I were as dumb as dirt. She said she wanted to speak to a manager and when I offered to transfer her to one, she didn't want to hold for one (despite the fact that calling back would leave her on hold not once but twice anyway) and when I explained the prior fact in parenthesis, she told me "I didn't ASK you." When I asked her if her internet was working okay, she told me no, it was running slow... so I asked her if she wanted me to take care of that issue as well. No, she didn't want ME doing anything else for her. I still handled the call with grace, with tact, with professionalism, and with a smile on my face. Then I broke down crying from frustration and sheer anger after the call ended.

I'm pretty tough but in, going on, 17 years of customer service experience I have never, and I mean NEVER, encountered a customer as psychotic and hateful as this woman. And I've handled a LOT of customers.

In other news... if you KNOW you can't handle or understand the internet and the equipment that comes with it?? DON'T ORDER INTERNET SERVICE!! And especially don't call in, let me go through an HOUR'S worth of troubleshooting and walking you through every single step of the process explaining every single step as simply as possible... and then TELL me you are thinking of cancelling because you "just don't know anything about all this stuff" and you "just don't understand why it has to be so complicated". And please, please, PLEASE don't call in to Tech Support and try to have me talk you through things ON... SPEAKERPHONE. This irritates me and makes it harder for me to hear you and understand you and for you to hear and understand me. And when ya TELL me so - my tongue hurts alot from biting it because I want to yell at you and tell you to take me off the damn speakerphone so we can get this finished and I can get you off the freakin' phone!!

What have we learned today, dear readers?

1) Don't call Tech Support on speakerphone

2) If you know you can't understand the internet - don't GET the internet

3) Don't be beligerent and mean to people who are just here to help you

Until next time, dear readers!!

Lis

Is it a bird?? Is it a plane?? Is it my battery back-up?!?!

So, when you hear a "chirping noise" coming from somewhere in your house, do you immediately suspect a piece of technology and call tech support?? Apparently, some people do.

I had a sweet older couple call (older as in 80's) me one day for some tech support. She had been hearing this beeping or chirping noise coming from a black box near her TV. Okay, there's a few things that could be. After question upon question as well as many attempts at trying to get this lovely woman to DESCRIBE the box she suspected the noise was coming from, I had weeded out any of my company's equipment. It wasn't her equipment's battery back-up, it wasn't her computer (they didn't own one), and the box she suspected it to be didn't have any lights on it -- our company doesn't send out anything that doesn't look like a miniature disco for your livingroom. So what the hell could it be??

That's when someone who'd overheard my conversation, stopped near me, listened for a few more minutes and then promptly pointed at a nearby smoke detector.

EUREKA!! Well, it wasn't an epiphany, but that's about the time that my sweet older lady must haved started hearing the noise again and walked closer to the source, because I heard it too!! And I'll be dipped if it wasn't the sound a smoke detector, low on batteries, makes!! I asked her if she had them in her home and when the last time she'd changed the batteries in it was. AHA!! Her turn to have an epiphany. She hadn't thought of that! So here I am troubleshooting her smoke detector. Fun, fun. /sigh

Speaking of the non-tech savvy... I did have a great lady the other day who called to have me help her connect to her wireless internet. Her "geek", yes, she had one of her own, had come over and helped her connect up her modem and router already. She just didn't know how to connect when she had no connection. So we checked the hookup of the modem and it's fine, and come to the realization that she needs to run the setup CD that came with the router that will give her the network name and the password she needs to connect as well as prepare the router for her connection. And that's when it happens.... dead silence on the other end of the call. Did I lose her? Is she looking for the CD? And then I hear:

"Well, where do I put it?"

What?? It's a computer CD! Where do you normally put computer CD's?? As a friend suggested, I SHOULD have told her to "find the cup holder on her computer". But, as a Tech Support agent, I had to bite my tongue and hold back the real answer that sprung to mind and tell her "in the CD drive of your computer, ma'am." As if it wasn't the logical conclusion. Ah well... such is the lot of my job.

Lately, I've fielded more and more calls from people who have no clue how to operate a universal remote. If ya wanna operate your TV, ya press the TV button before you do anything. Same thing if you want to watch cable or a DVD! If you own a U-NI-VER-SAL remote, it's universally good for any device you program it to use. Hence the name. Or is that just crazy of me to assume?? Crazy, right? That's what I thought.

I get more waste of time calls like that, than I get legitimate calls about actual problems. Now, there are certain things that are out of my scope of support and when I tell you that, it's not MY problem that you can't stand the fact that I can't wave my Magic Tech Wand (I'm working on trademarking that) and connect it up. Don't yell at me! I'm giving you options, one which costs and one which doesn't, and not just leaving you swinging in the breeze. OR you have a third option: read the damn manual! Most manuals give you the instructions on how to hook your printer up to any network including how to do so with many different operating systems. And they're usually step-by-step! WITH PICTURES!! Even a monkey could hook the printer up, you just have to be smarter than the monkey.

And YOU called ME, right? You called me for a reason. Because I have a job to do to repair whatever it is you called in about that's broken. LET ME DO MY JOB! Don't get a step ahead of me, don't be a step behind me, and definitely do NOT go ahead on your own and do something that could make your services irrepairable! (Is that a word? It is now!) If you push a button that I didn't tell you to push and mess things up even worse than they already are? Guess what?? You're getting a tech which you'll have to wait at LEAST 24 hours for when I could have had your service up and running in a few moments. You called me to do a job, let me do it? I'm not getting paid to sit and listen to you postulate about - What if's? - now am I? What if I push this red button?? Ummmm.... there's a reason it's RED. Red means stop. Red, means danger. Red BUTTONS usually mean - DON'T FREAKIN' PUSH ME!! But, no, you ask and before I can give you the answer, you've already pushed it and POOF. Why did all the lights go off? Uh, cuz ya pushed the red button, didn't you? /hangs head and shakes it

Stop and thinkabout this, dear readers, before you call your friendly (yet frustrated) neighborhood Tech Support agent.

Until next time!

Lis

If it's too loud... TURN YER DAMN VOLUME DOWN!!

Well, dear readers, here we are with another blog entry. And what do we start with? The quote of the week!!

And this week's quote of the week? This one's a doozie!

"My internet don't be workin' neither!"

Now to deal with the issue of the day -- volume control.

Just because you can't hear me... doesn't mean I can't hear you. And vice versa, sometimes. Now, when you can't hear me, TELL me and I can adjust my mic to make sure you can hear me. Don't just start shouting at me! It's like shouting at foreigners or speaking slowly to the blind! It's counter-productive! And if I'M too loud, tell me and I can speak more softly, OR... now here's a thought, stay with me on this... TURN YER DAMN PHONE VOLUME DOWN!!

Now, turn about IS fair play... I've been on hold several times and the volume on my customer is fine, but then the hold music volume is BLARING!! And not only is it blaringly loud and threatening to deafen me, it sounds like bad 70's porn music! And I don't DARE turn it down for fear of missing when the person I'm trying to reach actually picks up the phone and doesn't care about their job, so they mumble their way through things. Now there have been a few times when the person on the other end of the phone (*cough*Sharon*cough*) is enthusiastic and always cheerful and adds to the throbbing of your eardrums by driving them straight into bleeding with their happy greeting! NOT that I'm complaining! I would take a THOUSAND of those cheerful people over one of the mumblers...but DAMN, people! Enthusiastic is one thing - deafening is another.

Now, to seguay into holding... Hold is of the devil most times... and at others can be a blessing. You call one time and get no hold music, you call another time and get a tune you know and/or like. Guess which hold lasts the shortest?! Of course! The one time you enjoy being on hold, it lasts the least amount of time and you get someone right away. The bad 70's porn music lasts forever and ever and ever....

And if they demand to speak to a supervisor?? They're going to be ticked at you, ticked at the company, ticked at the world, and most of all - transfer the anger to the Supervisor. Which can be, at times, a source of joy to the lowly grunts in tech support. We all just randomly smile for a moment and it's because somewhere a supervisor has withered under the anger of another customer put on hold for 45 plus minutes. It's like a fairy.... when someone doesn't believe a fairy dies. But at least you can clap and bring them back! Supervisors? Their souls wither more and more and the only thing that can revive even a small piece of their soul is a call giving an agent kudos for a job well-done! Even then it's a tiny piece. It's like stabbing a horcrux! A little piece of that soul dies....

Hold, leads to the customer who gives up. They give up because they're angry, they give up because they're tired, they give up because... well, you happened to get their call while they're driving somewhere. It's Tech Support. Ya call Tech Support to help you with your tech. If you're not WITH the tech, then we can't support it. Calling me from your car and telling me that your "internet don't be workin'..." is POINTLESS. You can't answer any questions for me AT THAT MOMENT. If I need to know what color a certain light is, whether something shows on your screen or not, or whether a wire is plugged into one place or another.. .I need to know what it is at... that... moment. Not what it was like when you left the house that morning or 2 hours ago or even the last time you called in. So calling tech support while driving your kid to soccer practice is just dumb. Also, calling me 10 minutes before you have GOT to leave to go get your kids or attend an important meeting at work to tell me that ALL of your services are down is probably not the best idea when a problem like that takes a minimum of 15 to 20 minutes to take care of. If ya don't have the time - don't pay the dime! (Yeah, I know it costs more than that now, but I needed a word that rhymes, dammit!) Don't be THAT guy that calls me, tells me (in a deep southern twang to boot) that his TV that HE didn't order, but his wife felt they needed, isn't working and that I need to fix it... and then tell me, when it's taking longer than a wave of my magical Tech Support Wand, that you don't have TIME to deal with it because you have to go fix a TAR (that's Southern twang for tire) right now. Don't be that guy!

Okay, dear readers... enough spewage for this entry...

Until next time!

Lis

Stop, Heeeeeey, What's That Soooound...

That, dear readers, would be the soothing sounds of your friendly (yet frustrated) neighborhood Tech Support Agent. LISTEN... TO... THEM!!

We ask you questions and give you information that is, contrary to popular belief, very important to you and beneficial to getting the issue you called in about resolved. Which is why you called in, in the first place, right??

Now, while we do have certain things we have to say to every customer who calls, the rest of it is pertinent information to you and your individual situation. So when we ask a question, please, please, please, please listen to us?

Example:

The customer who calls has one TV that is showing nothing but snow on it.

Me: Okay, Ms. Customer, now... is this the only TV that is experiencing this problem?

Ms. Customer: No, the one in the bedroom's fine!

Ummmm... right.

Breakdowns in communication (i.e. you not listening to us) also lead to customers asking questions about things we've already stated as clearly as humanly possible. So if the baby is crying and the dog is barking, the family is expecting dinner on the table or your favorite show or sports team is on the TV -- STOP and think before you call? We devote our time to you! Sure, it's what we get paid for, but when we have to repeat ourselves or ask if you're still on the other end of the phone-line because you've had to mute us to yell at Bubba or keep the dog who's barking at absolutely nothing from deafening us?? It doesn't help us, which means it's far more difficult for us to help you. Big tip?? Most tech support lines that include such important things as telephone services nationwide should be open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Call when the kids are in bed, the dog is in the backyard, dinner is finished, and you have the time and attention span to pay attention to US as much as we pay attention to YOU.

Oh... and that call from your cousin or your best bud coming in on the other line?? It can wait!! Seriously!! This is why you have voice-mail... They won't pass out or lose a limb or the ability to see or hear because they've had to leave you a message while you deal with tech support. Asking to put me on hold for "a sec" to answer the other line or ask me to hold on while you answer the "cliche dog bark" on your phone because your sister/uncle/BFF/etc. is calling... only to TELL them you have to call them back because you're talking to tech support?!? This wastes my time as well as yours. When they get voice-mail, it's IMPLIED that you will call them back when you're able to. Hence, the typical message on voice-mail (or an answering machine) states something along the lines of "...unable to answer the phone blah, blah, blah.... leave a message and i'll call you back..."

So next time you're on the phone with an issue that was important enough for you to call me while you make dinner, banging and crashing dishes around and the kids yell and scream in the background... Don't act like I'm asking you to perform miracles when I ask you to walk across the room to look at something that is going to HELP me fix this oh-so-important issue (God forbid the kids can't watch Barney or Dora or you miss American Idol) you've called me for and then expect me not to be inwardly peeved when you ask me to "hang on a sec" so you can answer a call from your mother/son/spouse/significant other only to tell them you can't chit-chat right now because you're talking to tech support.

Cuz I WILL be peeved. You won't know it, but I'll be making faces at you and making rude gestures at my screen if you tick me off too much with stupidity and ignorance. And you other tech support geeks?!? Don't EVEN act like you've never done this, because you have. Maybe not the rude gestures, but you've made that face. You've rolled your eyes or stuck your tongue out at the screen or even done that silent facepalm as you shook your head. I know you have!! It's human nature - you can't stop it.

So the moral of this story is:

You expect us to listen to you, the least you can do is listen to us.

Thanks for tuning in, dear readers... sorry it's been so long between posts, I've been sick. :(

But I'm back!!

Until next time!!

Lis

Lunacy!!

Tonight, dear readers, I've heard it all... well, until tomorrow anyway...

You know all the jokes about Indian people and tech support? Well, it's not always true. I had to help an Indian gentleman work on his computer this evening! He had connection but then couldn't browse the internet. Come to find out it was a setting in his browser that kept UNSETTING itself when he would reboot his computer! So, all-in-all I'd done my end of the call and made sure he was connected to the internet, but when it came to his browser and computer being the issue with it all... he didn't want to believe it. He kept trying to chalk it up to the internet and his connection. He finally asked for a supervisor when he didn't want to believe what I was telling him. I had to get him through to a supervisor so the supervisor could tell him what I was telling him. Wonder if he'll believe them??

The other call that went FAR FAR FAR to the side of sheer idiocy was a call I got for an internet customer self-install. Okay, so our customers can elect to do that if they so desire. Saves them the tech call and waiting around for someone all day to do the install. When they ask for the self-install though, you would hope that they would know what they were getting themselves into. Not so with my customer. I wound up walking her through every step except opening the box and taking the equipment out. I'm surprised I didn't have to do that too!

But, Lis, it couldn't have been that bad! C'mon... yer exaggerating!

Nope. I wish I was, readers.

I had to repeat myself more than that damn tractor pull announcer (Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!!) and even try 4 times to explain what a WALL JACK was! Ya know... the jack in the wall where you plug the telephone in? Is it--? No, no ma'am, it's not in your computer... it's in the wall. Yes, the wall. No, it should be in that room along one of the walls. Right, right. Now the other end of that cord goes into the back of the modem. The modem. The box they sent you in the mail. Right. Not, not the computer, the modem. Right, the box they shipped you. Okay, now for the other cord. That one plugs into the back of your computer. No, not the wall, the back of your computer. Mmhmm... yes,the back. No, the back. Okay, I'll wait. Is it plugged into the back? Okay, good. Now the other end of that cable plugs into the modem. Right, the box. Didja get it? It won't go in? Do you have it turned the right way? Yes.... yes, ma'am, when it clicks then it's plugged in. Now, did you plug in the power cord? The power cord. So the modem has power? There should be a power cord in the box. Should be a small block on one end and a small round connection on the other end. Mmhmm.... it's going to plug into the back of the box. The round end gets plugged into the back... right, right... The other end? It plugs into a wall outlet. The wall outlet? So it gets energy? The wall out-- right. The plug end goes into the wall outlet. (As I hear the customer mumble to herself and then say DUH! Referring to herself.)

After that I only had to tell her 6 times that her internet wouldn't work tonight because we needed to send someone out to fix it.

I have another story, but I'll save that for tomorrow. Ya know... just in case tomorrow is a slow day. :)

Until tomorrow, dear readers!!

Thanks for tuning in!!

Lis

Same Old Same Old...

Welcome, dear readers, to another week of Tech Support.

The Quote of the Week so far?

"The economy just isn't awesome right now."

-- 50 year old customer on why she has to downgrade her services

Other than that, I've had the usual. Mispronunciations.... I still want to know what the ITHERnet is and how one manages not to stay connected to it. Ither, either, or the othernet??

I also want to know what drives people to smoke and eat into a customer service agent's ear. I'm trying to help you and when you can't hear me and I have to repeat myself because you're crunching on something too loudly? Inconsiderate. How would you like it if I was doing the same thing to you?

"*chomp chomp* Yeah, I need you to *chomp chomp slurp* reboot your *crunch chomp* computer for me."

Not nice is it? And when I can't get an answer out of you because you're taking a drink or a drag? Also counterproductive. It's not like we're going to be on the phone very long (relatively speaking)! You couldn't wait until we're finished with the call to do all this?? Or at least excuse yourself for a moment if you really need to take a drink?? C'mon, people!! Where the hell have manners gone?

I did have a few nice people so far this week! But I do have to stop them short when they call me an Angel or a Saint. I'm Tech Support, plain and simple. It's my job to handle the issue when you call in and if I do that to the best of my abilities, then it's an awesome feeling! I don't possess any miraculous powers or even magical abilities to fix your computer or reconnect your TV service. Heck!! Most of the time, you as customers actually do the fixing, I just tell you what steps to take based on what your problem is! I'm no Angel, and I seriously doubt there will ever be a Saint Lisa - Patron Saint of Tech Support, but thanks Mr./Ms. Customer for making me feel like one for a few fleeting moments. It does, indeed, brighten my day. (Just remember you said that when the all important survey comes around, folks!)

All is well in my little corner of the Tech Support world! If things go weird again, you can bet there'll be a blog post!!

Until next time!

*hugs!*

Lis

You're dumb -- PERIOD.

Oh, where to begin today?!?!

Let's start small... Companies need someone who knows how to use spellchecker. Plain and simple! It's ElecTromagnetic... not elecYromagnetic. A slip of the finger, sure, but enough to make an agent's brain skid to a halt while reading and momentarily slow them up while they decipher something the know they should know.

Best quote of the day:

Me: Okay, Sir, in your address bar (see previous rant) type in blah blah blah blah DOT yadda yadda yadda....

Customer: Okay. Blllaaahhh...... blah...... blah blah..... *long pause* Mumbling: Dot button? Where's the dot button? Then louder to me: Ummm... which button do I press to get the dot?

Yeah... that happened.

As a college student in an area like Berkley, sitting on the phone, mumbling and babbling at Tech Support at 8:30 at night -- pretty much marks you as awkward and lonely. And as a college student? Placing a CD into the CD-ROM drive of your laptop is not complicated!! Oh... and as a tech support agent? I really, REALLY don't care if you left your laundry downstairs and have to go get it. I like to create rapport with my customers, but that is TMI!! And when you tell me your modem is really hot all of a sudden... it's probably because you have it "sitting on a pillow" and telling me that just entertains me! As does being surprised that setting it on a pillow would heat it up!! And the final straw?? When you say "It has to sit on a flat, solid surface??". Yeah, this happened too.

And I've learned to believe members when they say they're not "tech savvy". Not being tech savvy means you don't know where to find the "back" button on your web browser. Not being tech savvy means you have NO clue how to use the, supposedly, super user-friendly Macintosh laptop you just got. Not being tech savvy.... is knowing when to thank your tech support agent for being so understanding and patient as she holds your hand through every single step of installation and registration. Thank you, Mr. Customer, for knowing that while I'm patient on the outside, inside I want to slap you out of the way and just do it all for you.

That is all..... for tonight.

Until next time, readers!

Lis

Tech Support is all about the Information...

...or MISinformation, such as the case may be.

Some of the things I've come across on calls lately really make me wonder about the human race. On the whole, people are intelligent enough to get through a conversation with a tech support representative and get their equipment back up and running. Then there are others...

And these are just a few of the examples I see every day.

The search bar of Bing and Google is not the address bar. When I ask you to type something into your address bar and you type it into your search bar it just makes the process take twice as long. Not only that, but I specifically tell you that the place I want you to type in the website address is the address bar at the very top of the web page. Now, I understand that people download extemporaneous toolbars and such which could also be at the top of their web browser, but you should definitely learn the difference between those and your address bar! How do you function on the internet without knowing something as simple as that??

Another thing? Just a tip, okay? If there's a cord running from your computer to a modem or router... then it's not wireless. If there's no cord running between your computer and your modem or router, then it's most definitely wireless and telling me otherwise, tends to muck up the troubleshooting process.

Oh... and a tip for the agents? If a customer calls in and tells you that, after plugging it into 16 different outlets in his home, that the modem doesn't have power -- then troubleshooting the modem BAU (business as usual) is a little, well... okay, I'll just say it: asinine!! Seriously? These people trust us with the fact that we're supposed to know what we're doing with their equipment and you've just made your credibility go right down the drain by trying to continue to work on a modem with no power, idiot! And another thing? Why would it even take 4 other people to fail at doing a job that 1 agent wound up doing in the end? That's ridiculous and unnecessary!!

*takes a deep breath*

Okay... enough for today!! Though, as long as I'm doing tech support there will always be more blogs and more fun! So stay tuned, dear readers! The fun is never ending!

Until next time...

Lis

There's no Crying in Tech Support!!

So.... I understand being upset that your services aren't working. I even understand being pissed off that your services aren't working. I understand telling me that you're sick and tired of hearing apologies and want actions. But bawling your eyes out because your internet is down?? Come, come now.... really?

I understand you live in the country. I even understand that you take care of your really elderly mother and need your VoIP phone which has been down because your internet is down. What I don't understand is the tears and dramatics you turn on when I answer the phone. If your services go down and half your house has been taken out in the process by a tree falling during a storm? THAT'S upsetting. If someone close to you dies and your services go down, for whatever reason, in the process of trying to let everyone know. THAT'S understandably upsetting!

But when your services go down leaving you without your VoIP phone and you call in on your cellphone, which you can also contact 911 on, crying is just a bit of overkill. Especially when I've reassured you that I will get something done about it and apologized for your previous experiences with my company. When I've told you that I will get to the bottom of your issue and do everything in my ability to get the situation rectified and you keep crying and crying?? I think there's something else going on beyond your internet being down. And if there's not, your dramatics are getting you nowhere faster than when it would if you were calm and not berating me for something I had no control over.

Matter of fact.... it's only slowing me down (a little) because I can't get a word in edgewise to ask the questions I need to ask to get your internet running again!! And all you can focus on is not your internet, but the fact that you've "had it!!" and just can't "take anymore!!". Know what? To the untrained ear that sounds like you're taking your frustrations about being stuck in the country taking care of your elderly mother, out on me. But what do I know? I'm just a Tech Support agent. I'm just here to handle your equipment and get your services running again.

At any rate... if you're frustrated and, for goodness sake, crying your eyes out over your services being down, take a tip from me? Calm down, gather yourself, and realize I'm just here to help you before you call in and take your really crappy life out on me? I'm just here to help!

Something I can't do until you can help me.

That's how I see it...

Until next time,

Lis

What Tech Support Means to Me (Lisa)

Tech Support... those two dirty words.  To some people it's a last resort and to some it's a crutch to lean on for every little ache and pain they may experience with ANY piece of "technology".  Ahhhh... technology.  There's another terrifying word.  Depending on what era you grew up in, it's either a blessing or a curse to you.  So put them together and what do you get?  Well... I, for one, get a headache.

Tech support is not a job that just anyone can do.  At times you have to have the patience of a Saint and others... well, no you really just need the patience of a Saint.  :)   A sense of humor helps, most definitely... and a dash of the ability to suspend reality and believe the occasional odd story.  Throw in a great deal of understanding and, if you ask most of our customers, (no offense meant to ANYONE) the ability to speak English well and you have the perfect tech support representative.

The perfect customer?  There isn't one.  The perfect customer would know what they were doing with their equipment, never have a problem, and never need to call tech support!  Well, okay... they will, eventually.... when/if their equipment dies.  Most customers have the standard, run-of-the-mill problems or they're calling in because their services have all died due to an outage in their area that they just don't know about yet.  And then you have the customers that this blog will be dealing with, for the most part.  The non-tech savvy, the techno-phobic  those who think they're tech savvy until they spew out a line of Greek that has nothing to do with their services (and/or technology in general), and even those who are tech savvy to the point of absurdity and think that we, as tech support, know far, far less then they do and surely we can't help them and they definitely need the next level of support.

Customers are those who give us such fun terms as "modium", "esthernet", and the concept of "intercepting" their equipment instead of installing it.  They're a source of income, but also an endless source of humor and entertainment on occasion.

But in the end, these are just definitions and descriptions.  What does tech support really mean to me?  It means helping someone, whether they know what they're doing or not, to not only understand why they don't have a certain service or services, but also that we're here to get them reconnected and their equipment running again.  It means listening to the customer, even if it takes them 30 minutes to tell you that their services have been intermittent for the past 24 hours.  It means lending an ear to a customer who's not necessarily upset with you or even your company, but is royally ticked at their spouse who set up the couple's equipment and connected their own laptop and then conveniently forgot the wireless password so the spouse could connect their laptop.  It means talking to someone's 12 year old son or daughter because they simply don't understand the technology like their child does.  It means taking an hour to reprogram a piece of equipment because the customer is in their 80's and they have to use a magnifying glass to read the buttons they need to press.

All-in-all?  It means customer service.  It means caring and understanding.  It means that at the end of the call that customer is happy and satisfied with the outcome of that call and the way you brought them to that outcome.  It MEANS supporting the customer... not the technology really.  It's called tech support because most customers probably wouldn't understand the title: Customer Support with an Emphasis on Technology.  And Customer Service is already taken.

So that's what Tech Support means to me - supporting the customer.

I thank you, new readers, for tuning in and reading our Blog.  I hope we can entertain and enlighten you about the world of Tech Support and bring you to howls and tears of laughter along the way.

Until next time!
Lisa